


The Things We Missed

by The Office_Geekery (Outlander_Geekery)



Category: The Office (US)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-12
Updated: 2020-03-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:21:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 10,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23114599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Outlander_Geekery/pseuds/The%20Office_Geekery
Summary: This was my take on the idea that Jim and Pam started a secret relationship after "Casino Night" and were seeing each other by the time "Gay Witch Hunt" aired. This is my take on the emails, phone calls and conversations we missed over the summer and for the first part of Season 3.
Relationships: Pam Beesly/Jim Halpert
Comments: 2
Kudos: 51





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story was originally written in September 2006 by me under a different name.

Five days after Jim transfers to Stamford:

To: Jim.Halpert@dundermifflin.com

From: Pam.Beesly@dundermifflin.com

Subject: Hi

Hi,

I know you asked me not to contact you for awhile, but I just wanted you to know that I hope you are adjusting okay. I won't ask you any questions because I know you don't want to talk to me right now. I just hope you are happy and everything is alright. 

This email is stupid, I'm sorry. I have written and deleted it 43 times.

When you feel you are ready, please just email me or call me to let me know how you are doing. 

I'm not deleting it this time.

Pam

**************

June 8, 2006 1:35am

It is chilly inside the car and the window keeps fogging up. She doesn't want to run the defroster so she just deals with it. She sees headlights coming up behind her in the rear view mirror. It is so early and the street is quiet so she figures this must be it. She slowly gets out of the car and waves down the cab. When the driver stops she makes the universal sign for 'roll your window down' and he does.

"Hi, are you here to pick up Jim Halpert?"

The guy doesn't say anything, just looks at a piece of paper from the dashboard and nods.

"Yeah, I'm sorry but he had to cancel. There was an emergency and he wanted me to let you know."

"Are you sure?" The driver looks pissed. "He just called me fifteen minutes ago."

She didn't plan for this. "Yeah," she says, "It just happened. Actually the ambulance just left, you didn't see it?"

"No, no," he isn't angry anymore, "Okay, well, I hope everything is okay."

"Yeah, I hope so too, thanks."

When he drives away she gets back in the car, starts the engine to run the defrost. When the fog is gone from her window and courage she pulls forward a bit and turns into Jim's short driveway. She waits another thirty seconds or so to get the courage to honk. Just once--like the cabbie would have.

She sees the front door open and Jim slowly struggle to get out with his luggage and carry-on bag. 

**************

June 8, 2006 1:41am

After Jim locks the front door he makes the small trek to his driveway. The cab isn't yellow. He thought it would be a yellow cab, but this is the first time he has used car service so he isn't really sure how it works. It is so dark out and the lights on the car illuminate the exhaust around it making it hard to make out what kind of car is in his driveway. He feels a little uneasy about the situation but walks toward the trunk anyway. When he reaches it, the trunk pops open. 'Don't bother to get out and help buddy, thanks', he thinks to himself. 

When his bags are in the car he walks around to back seat on the passenger side and gets in. 

"You will probably be more comfortable up here in the front seat."

**************

June 8, 2006 1:41am

She waits a couple of seconds before turning around to face him. He is shocked.

"Pam, what are you doing here?"

"Will you get in the front seat?"

"Where is the cab I called?"

"Will you just please come up here first?"

"What the hell are you doing in my driveway at two o'clock in the morning?"

"God damn it, Jim. Will you just please get in the front seat?"

He gets out of the car and moves to the front seat.

"I found out your flight information from Ryan. I told the cab driver there was an emergency and cancelled. I'm going to drive you to the airport."

"Pam, I asked you, please. I was doing so well not thinking about you and I am about to spend two weeks alone and really needed to keep my head clear... why couldn't you just..."

"I'm not getting married."

Silence.

"I'm not getting married and I just couldn't let you spend your time in Australia thinking I did. I broke up with Roy last night. I called the whole thing off--the wedding, engagement, everything. I promise, I won't call you again until you are ready but I just couldn't let you think I got married."

"Why?"

"Why, what?"

"Why did you call it off?"

"You know why... part of it is you, part of it is me. I am not in love with him anymore. I haven't been for awhile."

Jim is quiet and rests his head against the head rest.

"Ever since that night... I have been thinking... and the thoughts turned into realization... and the next thing I knew there was only one answer. No. When he touches me I wish it was you. When he kisses me I compare it to yours. When we... I wish it was us."

"I never thought I would ever hear you say those things to me."

Pam reaches over and takes Jim's hand. "I'm sorry I hurt you."

"No, you did what you thought was right. I understand it isn't easy."

"Jim, I'm going to need some time. I want to make myself perfectly clear here. I drove three hours in the middle of the night to make myself perfectly clear--I don't want to be just your friend anymore. I want us to be more than friends. I just need some time to get things straightened out a bit and figure out what I am going to do next. Is that okay?"

He looks at her. He has tears in his eyes. "Of course."

They are both unsure of what to do next. The car windows have fogged up again. Jim makes the first move and reaches over and kisses her. His lips feel soft and Pam can't believe she is able to touch them again. She starts grabbing at his shoulders, his neck, whatever she can to hold on to him as tight as she can. He moans a bit in her mouth and she feels it somewhere else. They break apart.

"We have to go..."

"I don't want to..."

"Yes you do. You need this Jim. You deserve this. You are going to have a wonderful time."

"Can I call you?"

"God, yes please." She looks at him. "Not talking to you these past few weeks have been hell."

"I just want to give you space."

"No, I know... don't tell anyone okay? Everyone will find out the wedding is cancelled tomorrow but don't tell anyone about us."

"I wouldn't do that."

"I know."

She drives to the aiport. They only talk about little things the rest of the way. It feels good to be them again. It feels good to be Jim and Pam. Before he gets out of the car she kisses him one last time. He promises to call her when he gets there. 

When he shuts the door she says 'I love you' to the empty car.


	2. Chapter 2

June 9, 2006 12:35pm

"Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam." 

Silence. 

"Dunder Mifflin, this is..." 

"Pam? Can you hear me?" 

Pam looks around and before bowing her head a bit. "Jim? Yeah, I hear you. How are you?" Her stomach makes a little flip. It is not unpleasant.

"I'm tired." 

"I bet, is everything okay? How was the flight?" It feels good to hear his voice.

"Long, but good. I can't talk long. I am using a calling card Michael gave me. It was supposed to have 55 minutes on it but it only has five."

Pam laughs. "That sounds about right."

"Hey, how are things there, I wasn't sure if you would be in today."

Pam glances around a bit to see if anyone is paying attention to her. "Yeah, I'm leaving in a little while. I was supposed to only work a half day. They're acting a little strange around me but it is okay. Angela hasn't said a word to me but I don't care."

"I wish I was there."

"I wish I was in Australia with you."

"It's not too late, you do have a week off." He sounds a little too hopeful.

"I do, but you know I can't do that."

"I know, but it was worth a shot," He is quiet for a moment. "What are you going to do next week?"

"My Mom is going to help me find a new apartment... not exactly how I thought I would spend my honeymoon week." She gives a weak laugh.

"Do you have any regrets?"

"Not one. Well... we aren't getting the money we paid for the food back, but other than that... not one. I made the right decision."

"Good, I don't know if this is going to come out right or not, but... I'm really proud of you. I don't want you to take that like I mean I am happy that you didn't marry him partially because of me. I just mean that I am proud that you put yourself first and made a decision you don't regret. Does that make any sense?"

"Yes, thank you."

"Okay, well I better go. I've got to find my hotel and stuff."

"Okay... Jim?"

"Yeah?"

"I really miss you."

"I miss you too."

*********************

June 15, 2006

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: This is for you... and Dwight.

I'm using your personal e-mail because I don't know if Michael is still reading our work e-mail. I'm sitting in a really awesome internet cafe right now. What did we do before Wi-Fi and laptops?

How are you? You were right. I am having a great time. It is so beautiful here. I really hope that someday we can come here together. I'm sorry I haven't called again but I just really don't want you to feel like I am trying to push you. I miss you so much and even though we are hours and miles apart right now, I feel closer to you than I ever have before. I know I'm a sap for saying this, but it is true and you know that I have a problem keeping my feelings inside lately no matter the time or place ;).

How did the apartment hunt go? Did you find something? 

I will be home on the 20th. If it doesn't seem too pushy, is there anyway you could come up to Stamford one evening soon? I would come to you but I don't want anyone to see us together. I would just like to take you out to dinner. Just let me know. No pressure.

I'm sending you a picture. It is so you and Dwight don't forget about me.

Miss you,  
Jim

*********************

Pam opens the attachment. It's a picture of Jim standing with the Sydney Opera House in the background. He's holding up a postcard that says, "Wish you were here." 

*********************

June 15, 2006 about 5 minutes later

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: RE: This is for you... and Dwight.

HI!!!

I hope I catch you before you leave the cafe. I am so happy you are having a good time. You deserve it. Please don't feel sappy about what you said. Jim, I'm going to be honest with you... I have been thinking about you. I didn't break up with Roy because of you, but since I've become single I feel like I can really think about what it would be like to be with you and not feel guilty about it. It feels really good. (I can only admit this to you because it's email--and my ears are still a little hot right now) I miss you and I can't wait to see you. Can I come to visit on the 24th? Would it be too weird if I stay over on your couch? I just don't want to drive home that late and I really shouldn't spend money on a hotel. We can talk about the rest of this later.

I did get an apartment. It is tiny but I love it. I can't wait for you to see it. I also found an art school that has night time classes. I got some information and I think I am going to sign up. The classes start in August so I have a little time to save up some money.

Have a great rest of your time and please take a lot of pictures so I will know what to look for when we visit again.

I love the picture, but when I showed it to Dwigt he said "real men don't wish". 

I miss you too,  
Pam

*********************

She hits send but doesn't close out her email.

She waits until almost everyone has gone to lunch and prints out the picture on the one color printer in the office and slips it into her purse.

It's the last thing she looks at before she goes to sleep that night in her new apartment.


	3. Chapter 3

"Okay, I'm turning down your street right now."

"Oh, you're that close already?"

"Yep, I'm probably like five minutes away."

"Oh, that's a problem, hang on..."

"What's wrong?" Pam hears whispering.

"No, no you have to go. She is going to be here any minute. Just go out the window. Wait, wait, no... take your clear plastic stripper heels with you."

"You're NOT funny."

"What? Hmmm? Oh, you could hear that?"

"You're NOT funny."

"I'm sorry," Jim laughs, "I'll see you in a minute."

"No, stay on the phone with me, what if I get lost?"

"You found my apartment in the middle of the night all by yourself."

"Yes, but I was very motivated."

"And you're not now?"

"Oh, no, I am..."

"I see your car."

"Come outside."

"Okay, bye."

"No stay on the phone."

Jim laughs again and walks out the front door. "Okay, okay, I am now outside on the phone."

"I see you. I'm gonna park in the street."

Jim walks past Pam's car as it clears his driveway and heads towards the driver side. 

"I'm here."

"Yes, you are."

Jim is standing right outside her driver side door. She looks at him through the window and turns the car off. Her eyes never leave his as she gets out of the car.

"Hi." Jim says.

"Hi."

"Can I hang up the phone now?"

Pam laughs. "Yes."

They both flip their phones closed at the same time and Jim moves in to hug her. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you too."

They are a little shy around each other at first. Jim helps her bring her small overnight bag inside. His apartment is small but very clean and very "Jim". She remembers the time the cameras caught her poking around his bedroom, looking for more insight into the man who occupied so many of her thoughts. This time he shows her his bedroom and a small dresser where she can set her bag down. This time when looks at his bed her stomach does a small flip-flop.

He takes her to a nice restaurant for dinner. It is a place Roy would have never tried. The food is good and by the end of dinner her nervousness is gone and replaced with something else. They share a bottle of wine and stories. He tells her about Australia and his new job. She tells him about her new apartment and art classes. 

On the way home it hits her that she is going to spend the night with Jim and she gets nervous again. When they step back into his living room she is unsure of what to. 

"Do you want to watch some TV?" Jim is nervous too.

Watching television quickly turns into making out, and soon things are getting out of control. Her hands are in his hair. His hand makes small circles on the left side of her rear end, wishing it could explore some more. They are both breathless and flushed. Being so close to her and touching her has made him hard and for the first time he doesn't try to hide it. 

"Pam, we should stop."

"I know." She kisses him again.

"No, seriously, please. I'm going crazy over here."

"I know, me too."

"You said you want to take this slow."

"I do... I'm sorry."

"Pam don't apologize please, it's fine. I totally understand. We just need to stop."

Pam can see the look in his eyes is a little desperate. 

"Okay."

"It feels amazing."

"It does." She kisses his cheek one last night and moves to stand up. She cleans up the coffee table a bit and brings their empty glasses into the kitchen. 

Pam rinses the glasses and asks, "Can I sleep in bed with you tonight?" 

"I'll take the couch."

"I don't want either of us to take the couch."

"I know... but..."

"I'll be good, I promise, " Pam is quiet for a moment, "It's just that I have to leave tomorrow and I don't know when we will be able to see each other again in person... I just want to be close to you."

Jim smiles and kisses her nose, "Okay." He takes her hand and leads her towards his small bedroom. "I'm warning you right now, I'm drawing a line down the middle of the bed and if you cross it, you are on the couch."

"Yes, sir."


	4. Chapter 4

They get ready for bed. Their shyness comes back as they each take turns using his small bathroom to change. When she puts on the small white tank top and shorts she brought to sleep in, she realizes the shirt doesn't leave much to the imagination. She puts her bra back on. When she is done changing, Jim joins her in the bathroom so they can both brush their teeth. It feels strange but wonderful to see him in the mirror. He glances at her every now and then, she glances at him too. He is wearing a tee shirt and boxer shorts. She has a feeling he doesn't normally sleep in a tee shirt, just like she doesn't normally sleep in a bra. His shirt is long and covers the front of his boxer shorts so she can't tell if he is still feeling what they were doing on the couch. 

They get into bed and turn off the lights. Pam is lying on her back and Jim props himself up on one side so he can see her better in the low lighting. His sheets are soft and the bed smells like him.

"Can I just stare at you for one moment?" Jim asks.

"Why do you want to stare at me?"

"Well, for one, you are beautiful, and two, I can't believe you are lying in my bed."

Pam blushes. She isn't sure what to say. "I think you are over the line."

Jim looks concerned for second until he realizes she is joking. "I never said that I couldn't cross the line." It's quiet in the room until Jim speaks again. "I know it isn't a good idea, but, I really want to kiss you again."

Pam doesn't say anything, she just meets him halfway. 

His lips make her dizzy and the heavy feeling between her legs comes back even stronger this time. She can't believe how little it takes to turn her on. Jim reaches down and pulls her hips towards him. One of his legs slips between hers and he purposely pushes his thigh up to where her legs meet. 

She's trying to stay quiet but the feeling makes her whimper. He is fueled even by the smallest sound from her and kisses her deeper. She knows this is not right. She shouldn't let him keep going if she isn't ready.

"Jim."

"I know..." 

"I don't mean to keep leading you on... it's just that it feels so good. I can't believe how good it feels. I feel stupid--like a teenager."

"Don't feel stupid." Jim kisses her cheek.

She wants to suggest they do other stuff. Maybe "mess around"--but she feels too embarrassed to ask. Embarrassed that he will now the last time she did any "messing around" she was in high school. Before she even realizes what she is doing, she is kissing him again. It is like a drug. She can't help herself. He stops the kiss.

"Pam?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I touch you a little bit?" He doesn't know how else to word it. "I won't push you any further than you want to go."

"I know." She kisses him again and hopes that he understands this means 'yes' because she just can't bring herself to actually say it.

He understands and one hand comes up to cup her breast. He squeezes it through her tank top and bra. He brings his face down to rub his cheeks and lips over her chest. He is so hard and he knows she can feel it against her leg. His hand moves down to the waist band of her shorts. He waits a bit to see if she will stop him, but she only kisses him harder and pulls on his elbow. He slides his hand inside her shorts and underneath her underwear. He is touching her for the first time. He feels soft hair and wet skin. His head spins. He feels drunk. He slides two fingers down to her opening and is greeted with the evidence that she has been enjoying this just as much as he has. When his fingers are wet, he brings them back up and slips them over her clitoris for the first time. His touch is soft and it makes Pam moan and grab his shoulders.

"Jim..."

He looks up at her. "Is this okay? Should I stop?"

"No, no don't stop." Pam reaches and down under the covers and pushes her shorts down to her ankles. She leaves her underwear on as if it matters.

She reacts to his touch just like he always imagined she would. She is quiet and a little shy. She gasps and sometimes whimpers or moans a bit. She moves her hips but probably not as much as she really wants to. He loves every second of it.

He pushes one finger back down and inside of her. She inhales sharply at the feeling. His finger searches for a certain spot. He thinks she might be turned on enough for this to work. When he finds it he crooks his finger just right and rubs. His earlier assessment was right. 

"Oh God, Jim..." She kisses him hard and her moans become a little louder. 

He keeps kissing her, using his tongue a lot to tease her and softly biting at her lips. The palm of his hand puts pressure on her clitoris as his finger moves inside her. 

Pam's hand moves from his shoulder to his hair. Her next move is something neither of them expects. Without hesitating her hand comes down and searches under the covers for him. She quickly slides her hand into his boxer shorts and grabs him. He moans into her mouth. Pam can't take it anymore. The feel of his finger inside her and his cock in her hand and his tongue in her mouth is too much. She pushes her head back into his pillow and comes. She tries to be quiet but it feels so good that her gasps turn into louder moans. She grasps his cock tight as she comes and she feels him pulse. He comes in her hand with a strangled cry. 

For a few moments the only sounds in the room are their heavy breaths. 

Jim is the first one to speak. "I didn't mean for that to happen."

Pam looks at him with a small smile on her face. "I'm glad it did."

"I swear, I usually can last longer than that."

"Sshhhh... stop." Her hand is still in his shorts and covering him gently. His semen is on her hand. For a second she realizes just how much she can't believe they are lying here like this. She kisses him again.

He removes his hand from her shorts and pulls her hips closed and towards him again. "You are beautiful."

"Thank you."

"I'm sorry we went a little too far."

"No, no we didn't. It was perfect."

Jim looks down and cringes a bit. "We should probably clean up a little bit."

Again, they take turns using the bathroom. This time when she comes back to bed she has taken her bra off and Jim is shirtless. They find each other in the middle of the bed and she rests her head on his shoulder. 

Just before she falls asleep Pam says, "Jim."

"Yeah?"

"I'm not ready to say it yet," Pam swallows, "but I feel it."


	5. Chapter 5

Tuesday, June 27, 2006 8:35p.m.

Pam's phone vibrates in her purse.

Jim Halpert: Did you forget about me?

***************

Tuesday, June 27, 2006 9:31p.m.

Jim Halpert: Did you have class tonight? I thought you didn't. Okay, call me when you get home.

***************

Tuesday, June 27, 2006 10:17p.m.

"Hi, you've reached 555-7947. I can't come to the phone right now but please leave a message and I will call you back."

"Hey Pam. It's me. I'm just looking for you. I thought you said you were going to call around eight, but you must have had class. I'm getting ready for bed now but just call me anyway when you get home so I know you are okay.

***************

Tuesday, June 27, 2006 11:47p.m.

Jim Halpert: I'm a little worried. Call me when you get this.

***************

Tuesday, June 28, 2006 8:30a.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: Call me.

Hi--

I'm so sorry about last night. Please call my cell when you get this. I tried your cell but got your voice mail.

Pam

***************

Tuesday, June 28, 2006 8:36a.m.

Jim looks at his cell. "No service". "God damn it," he says under his breath.

He looks around to see what everyone else is doing before he gets up and takes his phone out of the office. He quickly takes the stairs down to the front doors and sits on a bench. After a few seconds two bars appear and he quickly dials Pam's cell.

"Hi."

"Hi! Is everything okay?"

"Yes, and no."

"What happened?"

Pam is silent for a few seconds. Jim can hear her breath catch in her throat.

"Pam?"

"Roy got a D.U.I."

"Okay... is he okay?"

"Yeah, he is okay. He got into a fight with one of the cops and he is a little beat up but he is okay. He called me to bail him out of jail. I'm so sorry I didn't call you. My phone was in my purse and I didn't hear it."

"Why are you crying?"

"I don't know. I just.... I feel bad for him and I feel like this is my fault."

"It's NOT your fault."

"I just feel bad for him. I took him home and he was crying and I have never seen him like that."

Jim feels the bottom of his stomach drop out and his heart starts racing. 

"Jim? Are you there?"

"Yeah, I'm here... I just don't know what to say. I don't want to say anything that will upset you more."

"I'm not having second thoughts."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. That's not why I am crying. I just feel bad for him. I'm not in love with him and I don't want to marry him but... we spent so much of our lives together. I don't want to see him like this."

"I know..." Jim pauses for a moment. "Why did he call you?"

"Because, he still has my name on our savings account. I took my half out but it was easier for me to get the money for him."

"That's not why he called you."

"Yeah, I know."

"I'm sorry I got worried."

"No, Jim, I'm sorry I didn't call you. By the time I got Roy home and out of my car it was so late. I didn't want to wake you."

"Where are you right now?"

"I'm in the stairwell at work. I'm going to sneak into the downstairs bathroom until my face clears up. The last thing I need is for Michael to see me crying."

Jim laughs. "I wish I could hug you right now."

"I wish you could too. And please, do not worry for one second that I'm having second thoughts. I'm not."

"Okay, no, it's stupid. I just... I just got scared. We had such an amazing weekend and we talked Sunday and Monday night so I just got worried when I didn't hear from you."

"I know."

"I'm sorry about Roy too."

"Thanks. I know you two never really got along, but he really isn't a bad guy. I just hope he can get through this."

It hurts Jim when he thinks of how much history the two of them share. "Okay, I better get back to work."

"Okay. I'll email you in a little bit."

"Okay, do you have class tonight?"

"Today's Wednesday right?"

"Yeah."

"I'm so tired I don't even remember. Yeah, I have class until 9:45 but I will call you on my way home."

"Okay."

"Can I tell you something?"

"Yeah."

"One reason I really felt bad for him last night was... he kept saying how empty and sad he was without me. How he can't picture himself with anyone else and how much he misses me. I felt bad for him because I don't miss him. I don't feel empty. I feel great. I feel free and happy. The only person I miss is you."

Jim feels tears sting his eyes. "I miss you too."


	6. Chapter 6

August 17, 2006 10:23a.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com  
From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: I'm bored.

Yes, I know we just talked an hour ago. I'm bored. Are you busy?

I forgot to ask you, how did last night go? Was it weird going out for drinks with new work people?

Let's play a game.

******************  
August 17, 2006 10:45a.m.

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE: I'm bored.

Hi! No, I am not busy. 

Last night was nice. The people here are nice and normal. Josh is a really good boss and nice guy. I can't tell whether or not I appreciate it.   
How was class?  
What do you want to play?

******************  
August 17, 2006 11:07a.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: RE: RE: I'm bored.

Class was good. We had our first nude model. It was strange at first. I didn't know where to look.

Let's play "Truth".

******************  
August 17, 2006 11:32a.m.

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE RE: RE: I'm bored.

What is "Truth?"  
Was it a girl or guy?

******************  
August 17, 2006 11:57a.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: I'm bored.

It is "Truth or Dare" without the "Dare". 

It was a girl but we are going to have a guy in two weeks. 

Okay, I'm going first: Has anyone in Stamford asked you if you are dating anyone?

******************  
August 17, 2006 12:01p.m.

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: I'm bored

Yeah, two people have. I told them no.   
My turn: Do you think anyone there is suspicious about us?

******************  
August 17, 2006 12:26p.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

No, I don't think so. It will be harder when the cameras come back, but for now I don't think anyone suspects anything. Kelly keeps bugging me to go out with her some night. I don't want to.

Do you sometimes wish you hadn't moved away?

******************  
August 17, 2006 12:36p.m.

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored

Yes and no. I think it was a good idea even though things have worked out the way they have. It gives you space and we are not that far from each other. I really miss you when I am at work though.

Do you think I am giving you enough space?

******************  
August 17, 2006 12:52p.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

I miss you at work too.

Yes, I do. You have been very VERY patient ;-). I like that you can give me space but not think that it means anything about how I feel about you. You know that I just need to be on my own for awhile. It makes me appreciate what we have even more.

Do you wish that we were having sex?

******************  
August 17, 2006 1:14p.m.

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored

YES! No, just kidding. Of course I wish we were, but I understand. I also REALLY enjoy the stuff we do and I feel like we are having sex emotionally. I understand what it means for you to wait. I think it will make it mean even more when we do have sex for the first time. We will have waited a long time. LOOOOONG time ; )  
Am I the only other person you have been with?

******************  
August 17, 2006 1:27p.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com  
From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

Yes. I kissed a another boy at a party once when I was 14. Other than that, you and Roy are it. I know that is lame.

How many?

******************  
August 17, 2006 1:36p.m.

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored

It isn't lame.   
I think you are asking how many women I have been with, am I right?

******************  
August 17, 2006 1:42p.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com  
From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

Yes, and I think you are stalling, am I right?

******************  
August 17, 2006 2:12p.m.

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

No. I just wanted to be sure before I give up the information. I've had sex with 5 girls. I got a late start. I didn't do it for the first time until I was 19 (I know you didn't ask but I am in a sharing mood).  
How old were you?

******************  
August 17, 2006 2:27p.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

17\. I made Roy wait six months. He complained for about 4 of them.

What is your favorite part of what we do together?

p.s. Michael just came out of his office and asked me if I am sad I didn't get to change my name to Pamela Anderson. Lovely. Yesterday he told me now that I am single I should try wearing eyeshadow. 

******************  
August 17, 2006 2:51p.m.

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

I wish you were kidding, but I know you're not. Sometimes I actually kind of miss Michael. The guy who sits next to me calls me "Big Tuna". Try and guess why.  
Pam, you can't ask me a question like that while I am at work. I know you won't believe me but my favorite part is kissing you.  
What is your favorite part? 

******************  
August 17, 2006 3:14p.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

You're right, I don't believe you. No, just kidding. I love kissing you too. 

I can't believe I am going to say this but... you have very nice fingers. 

I don't think I want to guess why he calls you "Big Tuna".

I saw a magazine in your drawer. Do you look at it?

******************  
August 17, 2006 3:22p.m.

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

Because I ate a tuna fish sandwich on my first day of work. He is a strange guy. Nothing compared to Dwight, but still strange.

Yeah, sometimes. I hope you didn't think I was hiding it from you. I'm not. Does it bother you? 

******************  
August 17, 2006 3:43p.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

I don't think so. Roy used to hide them from me. I know it is just a fantasy thing. I don't think it bothers me.

******************  
August 17, 2006 3:56p.m.

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

That doesn't sound very convincing. We can talk about it more the next time we are together. I don't want you to be upset by it.  
What happened to your last question? I'll ask one.  
Who is a better kisser? Me, or the kid you kissed when you were 14?

******************  
August 17, 2006 4:12p.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

HA! You definitely. Don't get a big ego or anything, but you are the best kisser I have ever kissed.

I can't play anymore :-( Michael needs me to sit in on a phone call. 

Call me tonight?

******************  
August 17, 2006 4:14p.m.

To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE: RE RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: I'm bored.

You are the best kisser too. I really want to kiss you right now.  
Okay, have a good afternoon. Yes, I will call you tonight.   
I miss you.


	7. Chapter 7

September 21, 2006 2:35p.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com  
From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: They're back.

The camera crew started today. Did the new guy show up in Stamford? 

I had to do my first interview. They asked me about the wedding and I said I called it off but I didn't really give a reason. I think it is going to be harder now to keep this a secret. I just really don't want anyone in our business right now. 

Do you think we should come up with code names?

******************  
September 21, 2006 2:41p.m.  
To: p_beesly@gmail.com

From: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

Subject: RE: They're back.

Oh my God. I was just about to call you. Do you have any idea WHY Dwight and Michael called me this morning to ask where they can buy Gaydar?

Yeah, his name is Paul. He seems nice. He has a different camera than the other guys. He let me play with it a bit this afternoon. He is not as anal about the equipment as Stan. I did an interview too. I told them I transfered for the promotion. It isn't entirely a lie. Don't worry about wanting to keep this a secret. I kind of like keeping it to ourselves for now. 

Please... I already have ONE nickname I hate. Don't give me another. Speaking of "Big Tuna". I put that guy's calculator in Jello and he freaked the fuck out. I officially miss Dwight and his Gaydar. (I just got an awesome idea)

******************  
September 21, 2006 5:14p.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com

From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: They're back.

Sorry, it took me so long to get back to you. 

I can't even get into what kind of day today has been. You have call me AS SOON AS you get in your car.

I will give you a few hints:

Gaydar.

Gay porn.

AND Michael kissed someone in the office and it wasn't a girl. 

******************  
September 22, 2006 3:22p.m.

To: Jim.Halpert@hotmail.com  
From: p_beesly@gmail.com

Subject: Can't. wait.

Hey Big Tuna,

I have class until 9:45 tonight so if you get to my apartment before I do you know where the key is. I went shopping last night so there is some beer and snacks in the fridge. DO NOT go in my bedroom. Just wait until I get home. I have a surprise for you and I forgot to hide it this morning. PLEASE don't ruin it--you will be mad at yourself later--trust me. 

Okay, I have to go, the UPS guy is here and I can't only pretend to be taking a message over the phone for so long.

See you tonight. I'm so happy it is Friday.

I miss you,  
Codename: Chicken Plate


	8. Chapter 8

Her high pitched call is silly and she expects Jim to make a funny face when he sees her. "Hoonnnnneeey! I'm home!"

Instead her living room is dark.

It takes a second for her eyes to adjust, but when they do she can't believe what she sees and smells. Her small kitchen table is set, complete with candles and a small bouquet of red roses. There is a bottle of white wine chilling in an ice bucket she didn't even realize she owned. The room smells like garlic and a little bit of lemon.

The oddest part, though, is that her apartment is empty.

"Jim?"

She hears her bathroom door open. "Hi! Sorry, I was just washing up."

"What did you do?"

"Do you like it?"

"Yes, what did you do?" Pam has a huge smile on her face. She is still standing in the same spot.

"I made you dinner. I got out of work a little early so I hit the grocery store when I got here. I had a feeling you wouldn't have time to eat a real dinner before class."

"Grilled cheese?" Pam jokes as she takes a few steps towards Jim.

"No, not this time. My grilled cheese is only for special occasions. This time it is lemon chicken over angel hair pasta."

Pam doesn't say anything. She drops her purse and keys on the floor and closes the gap between them. She throws her arms around his neck and kisses him. Before she is even aware the words have left her mouth she says, "I love you."

Jim pulls his head back enough to be able to see her face. "What?"

"I love you." She says it again so he knows it wasn't an accident.

"I love you, too. I love you so much." Jim kisses her again and rubs his hands up and down her back. They are interrupted by a "ding".

"Dinner's ready."

"Where on earth did you learn how to cook lemon chicken?"

"I found a recipe online."

"Wow."

"What?"

"Nothing, just, wow. Thank you."

"Wait to thank me until after you've tried it."

They sit down and eat dinner. It is delicious. They share the bottle of wine Jim brought and share stories from the week. Jim talks about how Stamford is different and how he is trying to figure out a video game they all play on breaks. Pam tells him how Michael has made them watch Varsity Blues the past few 'Movie Mondays'. She tries her hardest to give an impression of Stanley doing the recap. Her impression is terrible but it makes Jim laugh because one, she is beautiful, and two, even though her impression is awful he can still picture Stanley so clearly.

After dinner she shows him the surprise she has hidden in her bedroom. It is a drawing of their first date. You can't see either of their faces in the picture. It is of their hands clasped across the table. Jim thinks it is beautiful and perfect.

"I love it."

"Do you? I worked on it for weeks. Look that's the noodle dish you ordered and here are our sake glasses." She points out different things in the drawing that portray their first date.

Jim eyes focus mostly on one point. "You can tell just by my hands that I am already in love with you in this picture."

They kiss for a long time after that.

She helps him clean up their dinner dishes and soon they find themselves in the same position they do every weekend night they spend together. In bed. Their clothes are somewhere on the floor and he's kissing her as his hand slips into her panties. She moans and tugs on his boxer shorts. He pulls his hand from her and helps her get his shorts off. Her underwear soon follows and he settles himself between her legs bare skin touching bare skin. They play a dangerous game each time they are together. They rub against each other and kiss until they can't take it any longer. A few times rubbing has been enough and they have both orgasmed from it alone. Other times they will use their hands or mouth on one another. Pam knows she is kidding herself to think this is any less intimate than sex, but Jim never pushes her to go any further.

Tonight starts out the same way. They rub. Jim slides the shaft of his erect penis against her. He knows if he puts just enough pressure on the left side of her clitoris he will get to hear her moan again. It's a sound he feels like he can't live without. Pam reaches down and cups his ass in her hands. She loves to pull his hips into her. He feels heavy against her and it makes her feel safe.

Jim spends a lot of time kissing her while they grind against each other. Sometimes if she is wet enough and he concentrates on how good her mouth feels he can almost pretend he is inside of her. Almost.

Pam snakes a hand between their bodies and for a second Jim thinks she is going to touch herself. She hasn't done that for him yet and the thought makes him feel like his head could explode. She doesn't touch herself. Instead, she wraps her hand around his penis and slides the head from her clitoris down to her opening. He can feel their wetness mingling. He knows he is dripping a bit and wonders if this is safe. It doesn't matter, though, because the feel of his sensitive tip being slipped back up to her clitoris erases all other thoughts from his head. She slowly makes circles around the sensitive ball of nerves. He loves that she knows exactly where it feels the best. After drawing circles around herself and rubbing his shaft a bit more to spread the wetness she again slips his penis further between her legs. They've played this game before too. How close can you get without actually having sex. It is torture for both of them but for some reason they just can't stop. Only this time it's different. This time the head of his cock slips inside of her just a tiny bit. The feeling can only be described as white hot. He lets himself enjoy the sensation for just a moment before tugging his hips enough to slip out of her. She uses her hand to bring him back down and push him in again.

"Pam, please... no. It is excruciating to have to pull back." Jim tries to keep his breathing in check and not sound too much like he is begging her.

"Don't pull--push."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I want to. I want to have sex with you right now. I want you inside of me."

Instead of pushing forward, Jim pulls all the way back and moves from between her legs so that he is lying next to her.

"Where are you going?" Pam reaches for him.

"Nowhere, I just want to talk for one second. Are you sure? Do you really want to do this right now or are you just getting caught up in how it feels?"

"No, I want to do this. Right now."

"I just want you to be sure. We can make each other feel good like we usually do without doing this right now. We can wait and maybe go away for the weekend or something--make it special."

"No, Jim. I want to. I'm sure. I don't need you to take me away for the weekend. I want to have sex with you tonight. I want to remember tonight as our first time. I want to remember the dinner you made me, and the look on your face when you saw the drawing I made you, and the way you told me you loved me. I want it to be tonight."

Jim kisses her and wraps his arm around her waist. "Is it okay that I don't have a condom?"

"Yeah, it's fine. I never stopped taking birth control."

"Okay, good." Jim is quiet for a second, "I love you."

"I love you, too."

They kiss and Pam reaches down between them to hold him in her hand again. For the third time that night he pulls away from her. Before she can protest he slides down her body and settles between her legs. His nose nuzzles her soft hair before his tongue touches her clitoris. Pam gasps at the contact and arches her back. Jim kisses and licks his way around her clitoris. One long finger slides inside her and rubs the rough patch on the front wall of her vagina. It only takes about a minute before Pam is squirming under his touch.

"Stop, stop, I want to wait until you’re inside me."

"Do you think you will be able to... that way?"

"Yeah, I do."

"Okay, it's just that I don't know how long I will make it so I really want you to enjoy it."

"Sshhh... don't worry about it. I will."

She grabs Jim's arms and pulls him back up so their faces are even with each other. They kiss and this time Jim reaches down to guide himself into her. He can't believe how good it feels when he slides into her for the first time. Pam gasps and holds on tightly to him arms.

"Are you okay? Does it hurt?"

"No, God no, it doesn't hurt. It feels amazing."

"I know... I can't believe it."

The room is dark and cold and quiet. The only sounds are the two of them breathing and kissing into each other's mouth. Jim starts moving his hips in a slow rhythm. He takes one of Pam's knees and pulls it up against his side. He can tell the angle works because she moans and twists her head to the side. Every time he pushes into her she can feel him hitting a sensitive spot. She's come like this before but not very often. She moves her arms up from his and wraps them around his neck. She sucks lightly on the sensitive skin on his shoulder and he starts to move a little faster. He keeps moving in and out and she can feel it building in her pelvis. She is going to come.

"Oh God, Jim, please don't stop, just like that, please don't stop." She usually doesn't talk much during sex and she certainly doesn't ask for things, but with him, it feels right. Her voice makes his balls tighten and he is sure she is going to make him come undone. He focuses on keeping up his rhythm and not losing it completely just yet.

It only takes a few more fast and deep thrusts before she is coming. Her soft moans fill the air around him and he can feel her insides tighten. Soon, her whole body is shaking in his arms. He keeps moving but he knows he only has a few seconds left. Her orgasm subsides but the feel of him inside her still burns.

"It still feels so good, does it feel good to you?" She knows he couldn't possibly answer right now even if he wanted to. Not that it matters, she knows the answer. He only nods and bites his lip. Soon his movement becomes erratic and she knows the end is near. He speeds up even more and then stops. He buries his face in her shoulder and cries out as he pulses between her legs. He moves a few more times as he comes and she can feel how wet they are now. He waits a minute to catch his breath before he moves. Jim lifts his face to hers and kisses her.

"Hi."

"Hi."

"That was amazing," Jim says.

"Yes, it was."

Jim slowly pulls out of her, turns onto his back and pulls her into his arms. Tomorrow is Saturday and they can enjoy the entire day together. He knows they will talk, and laugh, and probably even do this again before they both have to go back to the reality of work for another week. But for tonight they just hold each other and sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

Thursday, September 28, 2006 8:32a.m.

"Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam."

"Hey, it's me."

"Hi."

"I'm sorry I got upset last night."

"No, it's okay, I understand. I wouldn't be happy if I knew you were going out on a fake date either."

"No, I know. I know it is just for the cameras."

"She just KEEPS asking me, Jim. I've run out of excuses. It is just dinner."

"No, I know. I'm sorry I got upset. I guess it's just... since we did what we did last weekend... I'm a little more sensitive about keeping this a secret now. Do you forgive me?"

"Of course I do. But since we did what we did last weekend, you should feel more secure now than ever that you have NOTHING to worry about. It is just dinner and it is just to keep Kelly and the camera crew quiet." Pam is quiet for a moment. "Are you guys getting ready to go?"

"Yeah, have Michael and Dwight left yet?"

"No, Michael's 'fun jeans' are still hanging on the back of his door so I think he is around here somewhere."

"Oh God."

"Yeah, and these are a different pair--they're white."

"God, I miss him."

Pam laughs. "Do you want me to call you when I get home?"

"Yes."

"Okay, have a good time today. I'm so excited that you're who Josh picked to take with him."

"Thank you. Josh is a good guy. I like working for him."

"Good. I miss you. I'll talk to you later."

"Okay, bye."

******************  
Thursday, September 28, 2006 6:34p.m.

Jim's phone vibrates.

Pam Beesley: I'm hiding in the bathroom for a minute. This guy is a TOOL.

******************  
Thursday, September 28, 2006 6:42p.m.

Pam's phone vibrates.

Jim Halpert: Good!   
Jim Halpert: I have news. Hints: Dwight, room key, unexpected visitor. Call me the second you get home.

******************  
Thursday, September 28, 2006 8:15p.m.

Jim's phone vibrates. He doesn't even say hello. He gets straight to the point. "Dwight got a hooker!"

"What?"

"Dwight got a hooker!"

"What are you talking about?"

"I got his room key so I could pull a prank on him but the joke was so on me. I opened the door and there was a prostitute waiting for him in his bed." 

"What did you do?"

"I ran like hell! Paul was with me too. We booked it down the hallway! I almost slipped and said I had to call you I was so freaked out. I can't believe he got a hooker!"

"I don't think it was a hooker."

"I swear Pam. I was his room. Why else would a woman be in his room?"

"What did she look like?"

"I didn't see her face, only her legs. I took off so fast. I was floored."

"Well... I think I am about to floor you again."

"Why?"

"It was Angela."

"What? Ew, no shut up."

"It was."

"How do you know that?"

"Remember when I thought they were dating?"

"Yeah, you said you were wrong."

"No, I was right. They have been dating for awhile. Dwight is creepy but I don't think he would cheat on her with a hooker. It had to be Angela."

"I can't believe it. So Dwight wasn't lying all this time. He really does have a girlfriend."

"Yep, he really does."

"Gross."

"Yes."

Silence.

"So your date was a tool?"

"Yes."

"Good."

Pam laughs, "Let's just say the only person he was interested in at the table was himself."

"Good."

"Jim! At least have a little sympathy for me. He thought using the term "Freedom Fries" in one of his comics was "edgy". I kind of laughed in face but luckily he wasn't smart enough to realize it."

"Did he try to kiss you?"

"No, I didn't even let him walk out of the restaurant with me. He did try and look down my shirt though."

Jim asks, "What shirt were you wearing?" 

"Just a button down, but Kelly unbuttoned my top button in the parking lot because she said Michael was right, I should let these things breathe."

"Pam..."

"What? It wasn't my fault."

"You could have buttoned your shirt back up."

"Don't be mad Jim, I didn't do it to try and turn him on."

"I'm not mad, it's just frustrating. I'm here... you're there and no ones knows about us. I just worry that this won't be the only time someone tries to set you up. And you should have buttoned your shirt back up if it wasn't really a date."

"I'm sorry. You're right. I think I just got caught up in the fun of talking about a date and getting ready for a date. Everyone at work was really excited for me and they all wanted to give me advice. It felt nice. I can't talk to them about us, and I can't tell them all of the cute things you do for me or what I ordered on our first date or how I shaved my legs just in case. I'm sorry. I don't want you to be jealous. You have no reason to be jealous."

Jim sighed, "I know. It just gets frustrating. And I don't want to think about some man trying to look at you... especially after last weekend."

"I know, I'm sorry."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah..."

"Do you ever wish that maybe you had the opportunity to really date more?"

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"Well, I understand what you are saying. You are worried I will look back someday and feel like I never really got to date around and see what it was all about. But, from my point of view; dating seems really stressful and I would be looking for someone like you. If I already have you, why would I really want to put myself through that just for the experience?"

"Yeah..."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I made you upset and I'm sorry if I gave you any reason to be jealous. It was stupid and I should have button that button as soon as Kelly walked away. I guess it felt a little exciting to be fawned over and to see how men react to me as "Single Pam", but that isn't what I want."

"Okay."

"I miss you."

"I miss you too."

"Do you have a lot of meetings again tomorrow?" 

"Yeah, pretty much all day. Are you excited you get a whole day without Michael or Dwight?"

"Yes! But I would trade it for you to be back."

"Oh, now you are just sucking up."

"No!"

"I told Michael you were the reason I left Scranton."

"Why did you do that?"

"Because... I felt bad for him. He thought I left because I thought he was a bad boss. I didn't want him to think that and I told the truth. I just told him that he was a good boss but that I had to leave because you didn't want to be with me."

"What did he say?"

Jim laughs. "He said he would talk to you, so if he does... you know why."

"Great."

"Yeah, that shouldn't be awkward at all."

Pam sighs with a smile. "Okay, well I better go and get ready for bed."

"Okay... I will see you tomorrow night."

"Yes. Are you excited?" Pam asks with a sly smile.

"Yes... can we do what we did last weekend again this weekend?"

Pam laughs, "Yes, of course, it wasn't just a one time pass you know."

"Good."

"Okay, well get to bed and rest up!"

"Yes, ma'am."


End file.
